Here’s a little secret – They do (ok, most of them not openly), and they should!

Traditionally, most men were raised not to wear their hearts on their sleeves. Try to imagine three time winner of the Iron Man competition in therapy. The image just doesn’t compute, does it? An Iron Man wouldn’t admit to needing help. An Iron Man wouldn’t talk about his emotions. For that matter, the true Iron Man might not even recognise that he has emotions!

Tough, independent and unemotional - This stereotype, right here, is the problem with convincing men to seek help of any kind. This is slowly changing, with more and more men opening up about their feelings and being more willing to acknowledge and address the stress factors in their lives. However, this is not quite true for all men yet.

Thing is, the body holds and stores trauma and unexpressed emotion. The more you hold, the more the body has to carry the burden, causing significant physical and mental harm.

Did you know that suicide is now the leading cause of death in men under the age of 50? Something doesn’t add up. This cold, hard statistic suggests that men are not getting the help they need. Why? Are women truly from Venus and men from Mars?

Thanks to neuroscience, we now know that men are not as emotionally articulate as women. The amygdala, a small almond shape region deep in the brain, plays a key role in both emotional reactions and memories. And, wouldn’t you know it; the female amygdala is far more efficient! And that’s the reason why woman can recall emotional memories quicker (have you noticed?), and their memories are more intense (no wonder you still remember that hurtful remark about the red dress last Christmas!).

Another key factor is that the female brain has a better connection between its left hemisphere, which is involved in speech, and its right hemisphere, which is involved with emotion. When most women talk, both sides are activated while men only use their left hemisphere for speech. Yes, turns out that woman have a greater built-in facility for talking about their feelings!

But, neuroscience aside, studies suggest that men, to their own detriment, are less willing to express their emotions due to expectations put on them by society. Guys are often told they have to get “in touch” with their feelings, but what does this mean and how is it done?

Here are a few strategies:

• Be aware of the sensations in your body. Emotion always manifests somewhere in the body. Anger may be experienced as a flush of heat in the face, sadness as a tightening in the throat, and anxiety as a knot in the stomach. Take a moment to acknowledge these feelings and what they mean.
• Take responsibility, choose to feel.
• Learn to put words to what you’re feeling. Identifying and expressing feeling is a learnt behaviour – and like driving a car, it only takes practise.
• Take the risk of showing your vulnerability with people you feel safe with. It could bring you closer to the people you love and may even bring you a sense of relief.
• Ask for help when you need it. Yes, that includes asking for directions!

“A problem shared is a problem halved” is such a cliché, or is it? Talking about your inner struggles is not a sign of weakness. It takes balls.

Source: www.menshealthforum.org.uk, www.upworhy.com, www.menshealth.com, www.dailymail.co.uk, www.webmd.com, www.huffingtonpost.com, www.everydayhealth.com, www.mensline.org.au, www.telegrapg.co.uk, www.apa.org, everydayfeminism.com

DISCLAIMER: The information on this website is for educational purposes only, and is not intended as medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. If you are experiencing symptoms or need health advice, please consult a healthcare professional.