We called them rugged individuals, visionaries, and go-getters. We’ve always respected these confident folks for having all the answers.
Now, everything has changed. Larger than life egos are fast becoming liabilities. In fact, egos’ mortal enemy – humility – is one of the traits most likely to guarantee success in the 21st century. The Cambridge Dictionary defines it as “your idea or opinion of yourself, especially your feeling of your own importance and ability.” Does this mean we have to ditch, shrink, and leave our egos at the door?
Not so fast. There’s no harm in acting a little cocky when someone compliments you (why yes, you do have a great smile and amazing hair. Don’t stop yourself from accepting credit where it’s due; you are a pretty kick-ass person after all!). In fact, a healthy ego can be inspirational and admired by others. However - and here’s the kicker - having a big ego is all about arrogance, not confidence.
Sure, self-esteem and self-confidence are must-haves to survive in this big bad world, but when confidence crosses over into self-importance, well, then the red flags go up. Being egotistical is often synonymous with being selfish or self-centered. It also points to an exaggerated sense of self-importance, where a person might consider him or herself, as better than anyone else.
You can tell if your ego is healthy, rather than obnoxious, based on where it is focused and how you interact with others. Do you often find yourself in discussions where you simply can’t back down until you have “won”? Do you constantly compare yourself with people who you feel are better than you, or people who you feel are not as good as you? Are you jealous when others do well and often sulk when you don’t win a challenge (instead of feeling proud of your attempt)? Do you set yourself impossible goals, and then blame others when you don’t reach them?
If you recognize any of the above traits in yourself, it may be time to hone your humility. With humility comes more meaningful relationships, better opportunities, and an increased chance of staying relevant.
So, change your views on success and modify the way you look at failure. Praise yourself for the effort, rather than the outcome. Doing your best is what matters, external rewards are totally extra. Stop comparing yourself to others and playing the image game, remember, you are more than enough. And start to develop a beginner’s mindset; it’s impossible to learn anything if you think you already know everything.
One of the hardest battles you will fight in life is the one against your own ego. That’s because it constantly needs attention and validation. The ego, ruled by the mind tricks you into thinking that your self-worth is built on worldly labels; it’s not.
“Humility does not mean you think less of yourself. It means you think of yourself less.” – Rick Warren
Source: fastcompany.com, psychologytoday.com, kentuckycounselingcenter.com, bustle.com, womenshealthmag.com, businessinsider.com, loomancoaching.nl, wikihow.com, medium.com, jsonline.com, indiatimes.com, awci.org, powerofpositivity.com
DISCLAIMER: The information on this website is for educational purposes only, and is not intended as medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. If you are experiencing symptoms or need health advice, please consult a healthcare professional.