If you think that biting, whining, and hitting is just a phase, or “just what toddlers do” you’re mistaken. Sorry to say mom and dad, but you may have a little brat in your pack!
Let’s face it, few parents have the iron hand of previous generations, and for the most part that’s good. Times have changed and parenting styles have thankfully evolved. But, and here’s the kicker, sometimes in an effort to be kinder, gentler parents, our sweet little darlings get the upper hand and we as parents put up with truly awful behaviour.
The fact remains that no matter what your child’s age, parenting is tough. It seems as though there’s always someone out there telling you that you’re doing it wrong. If you leave your kids to try and work things out for themselves, then you’re neglectful – and if you’re too involved, then you’re a helicopter parent raising a fragile child!
We all want to give our kids the best but this could ultimately be a flawed approach, eroding the ability to set rules, limits and boundaries. It’s always easier to give in than it is to say “no”, yet it is our responsibility as parents to raise respectful, kind, responsible, and contributing members of society. No one else is going to step up to do so.
So yes, there are certain behaviours that is developmentally appropriate – like biting or hitting – but that doesn’t mean that it’s okay. These behaviours need to be addressed or they will continue. And yes, there can be a lot of reasons for less than stellar behaviour from your toddler – overtiredness, hunger pangs, or lack of attention could all cause your little tyke to throw a wobbly now and then; but once he learns that he won’t get what he desires from throwing a tantrum, he’ll be less likely to repeat it.
Thing is, kids are clever little creatures and if your toddler has never heard the word “no”, how will he handle hearing it when he’s 13 and wants to get a neck tattoo? Always be mindful of how you want them to act and what behaviours you’ll want from them as they get older. Valuable lessons need to be taught, kids aren’t born with them.
So, what’s a mom and dad to do? It’s up to you to draw the boundaries of acceptable behaviour. The good news is that toddlers who have clear boundaries feel secure and are less likely to act out.
Stick with just three or four non-negotiable rules, like “no hitting”, “don’t interrupt adults” and “pick up your toys.” Teach them that there will be consequences to actions, and stick to your guns on this one. Set the bar high and expect good behaviour. Model respect to others, they’re watching at all times! And, very important, teach them to appreciate what they have and what they receive by placing greater emphasis on experiences than on material goods.
There are only two things worse than a spoilt child, and that is a spoilt adolescent and a spoilt adult thinking only of themselves with no concern for others.
Remember, discipline is not something we do TO children – it’s something we do FOR them.
Source: www.popsugar.com, www.liveabout.com, parent24.com, www.momooze.com, www.parents.com, www.lindaleierthomason.com, www.pregnancymagazine.com, fridaymagazine.ae, www.grapevine.org.nz, www.drphil.com, autisticmama.com