Every cancer diagnosis is difficult, but processing the words no parent should ever have to endure; and certainly no innocent child, is devastating.

When first confronted with your child’s cancer diagnosis you may feel overcome with feelings of hopelessness; as if the ground underneath you had given away.  You may feel numb, confused, or unable to hear or remember information about the diagnosis or treatment.  You may also feel overwhelmed by powerful and painful emotions … believe it or not; these reactions are normal.

A seemingly normal family in an extraordinary situation … Childhood cancer strikes a terrible blow that affects, without exception, all the members of the family. The diagnosis often means surgery as well as chemotherapy or radiation, or both, along with their unpleasant side-effects. And, looming in the background of it all is the unspoken worry: “Will my child get through this?” Not only is there doubt and worry about the future, but there will be major life disruptions from the time of diagnosis throughout treatment.

How would you cope with the “new normal”?

Here are some tips for parents trying to cope with their child’s cancer diagnosis:

• Ask questions. You are your child’s advocate. Make sure that you understand what you’re child’s health care team tells you. Speak up when something is confusing or unclear.
• Gather information with caution. If you get information online, make sure that the source is credible and share what you find with your health care team to confirm that it applies to your child.
• Keep an organized medical notebook. Keep medication lists, appointments and questions for doctors as well as test results, in a safe place. Don’t try to keep track of everything in your head.
• Take one day at a time. This is a marathon, not a sprint. Focus only on the day at hand.
• Build a team. “It takes a village” is especially true when dealing with childhood cancer. Ask for, and receive help with open arms as friends and family provide meals, childcare, or take over household chores so you can focus on saving your child’s life.
• You are in charge of the big decisions, the life- saving ones. Whatever you decide, know that you did it with the best information you had and never second-guess your decisions. Ever.
• Take advantage of technology. Use social media to keep friends and family updated.
• Huddle around your family. Make time for your partner; even if it’s sharing a cup of coffee. Try to fit in some one-on-one time with your other kids who often get lost in the shuffle and miss your attention.
• Take care of yourself. No one is able to be a 24/7 caregiver. Eat healthy, spend time with your other kids or walk outside and look up at the evening sky.
• Vent your emotions. Join a support group. Many parents benefit from the experiences and information shared by other parents in the same circumstances.

Between 800 and 1000 South African children under the age of 15 are diagnosed with cancer each year. Thankfully, more than 80% of children beat cancer and go on to lead happy and productive adult lives.

So, Mom and Dad, try never to lose your joy during this difficult journey.  Celebrate the small victories and show resilience during the battles. Make sure that your child can draw strength from your smile every day.

Source: blogs.webmd.com, www.macmillan.org.uk, www.cancer.gov, www.cansa.org.za, www.cancer.ca, wol.jw.org, www.cancer.org, www.childrenscancer.org, blog.dana-farber.org, themighty.com, www.huffingtonpost.com, www.cityofhope.org, txch.org, teamconnor.org, www.livescience.com, www.bebravekeepgoing.com, healthlibrary.epnet.com www.parents.com, www.roswellpark.org, medlineplus.gov